My season of isolation hit about two weeks ago when I tested positive for COVID-19. When I was given the news, I left the testing site and tears began falling down my face so I pulled over on the side of the road to try and get myself together. I text my family, close friends and my supervisory team. For a moment, I was afraid; I had no idea what to expect. My anxiety starting spiking because being diagnosed with Diabetes, having severe asthma my entire life and being diagnosed with Lupus put me in the high risk percentile. My dad immediately called as soon as he was given the news. He heard me crying so he ministered to me and encouraged me. For this two week period, my father has called nearly every day to check on me. Friends and coworkers called and sent text messages; people brought me groceries and ensured that I had everything I needed. The support has been phenomenal, especially since I have no family and very few friends where I live and my husband works out of state.
These past two weeks have been a mix of emotions and adjustments. My sleep cycle has been affected, as well as my thought process and ability to complete certain tasks. Although I have been able to sit still and rest, my "normal routine" has been altered. In the midst of fatigue and other symptoms, I found myself praying and asking for answers as to why this occurred. Everything has pointed to my faith, the testing of my faith to produce patience as described in James Chapter 1.
Having this virus allowed me to see Most High in a new perspective. In isolation, I found Him to be a healer yet again; however, the isolation was not due to disobedience - it was because my faith needed to be strengthened. He became even more of a provider. When I thought that my needs would not be met, He showed me that they were and that He was still my Shepherd, my Elohim, my rock, my healer, my Waymaker, My Deliverer, and my Sovereign King. Yes my husband is there and he provides, but I needed to see Most High as the supreme provider in my life, despite the obstacles. COVID-19 funding is provided to employers in efforts to assist employees who are affected directly by the virus. For this, I am truly grateful. My faith is stronger, especially after hearing all the stories of individuals across the county and world who have experienced the deathly effects of this virus. Prayerfully, I have gotten through the worst of the symptoms; I believe by faith that I am healed.
This isolation period worked in my favor, it gave me an opportunity to reflect on projects I need to complete and work on. This "respite" helped me to see me and my relationship with Yah; to re-center myself within His Kingdom and focus on what I need to do next for His glory.
Beyond grateful is an understatement. Sure the enemy introduced feelings of insecurity, anxiety and thoughts of doubt; however, Yah reminded me to cast them down and He let me know that this isolation period was for His glory and His glory alone. He let me know that I wasn't alone. My husband shared that he felt my feelings of depression and wanted to come home to make sure I was okay. And yes, for a fleeting moment, I did feel the depression of isolation until my positive thought replacement skills kicked in and helped me push through. The encouragement from him, my father, daughter, family, close friends and others also gave me the push needed to persevere. My mindset changed to understanding that this period of isolation wasn't just about me getting rest, it was about me resting in the arms of Yah. It was about me truly understanding His place in my life.
With every breath, I praise Him for keeping me. It could have been worse but Yah. He protected me and allowed me to go through the symptoms, but he spared me. You see beloved, isolation can be a place of healing depending on how you see it. My flesh and spirit were at war, but I liken that to the Garden of Gethsemane where The Messiah, Yahawashi Hamashiach, the Savior toiled and prayed. He wrestled within Himself because He struggled with the task or purpose ahead of Him. We as believers share in some of His sufferings and we struggle with what He requires of us many times. I believe that this was part of my experience. In my prayer time, I have been praying for expansion in some specific areas. His ways are not our ways, His thoughts are not our thoughts. He answered me in a way I had never expected. BUT I am grateful. I needed this time, more than I realized.
Beloved, I challenge you to view your periods of isolation and alone time differently. Take advantage of what He places before you. It is for your development, your spiritual refinement. It is a time of restoration and preparation for what He has for you; for what is NEXT.
My prayers are with you. And I am here to serve you. Your #divinepurpose is my #passion.
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